Missing you

Ma, there are so many things I want to tell you but I dunno where n how to start. I still feel numb from the fact that you are gone from my life... Forever... Alot of ppl says tat grief would really kicks in on the last day of the funeral n thereafter. I m so dragging for that day to come.

From the day I remembered, I m sleeping with you in the same room. We shared the same room for 29 years before I got married n moved out. You are the one who took care of me since young as mom n dad needs to work. From young, I always has a phobia that you will die n leave me. Phobia to the extend that sometimes in the middle of the night I would suddenly woke up n check on you just so to make sure that you are breathing n alive. Sounded so silly right.. But on this day, 21.02.2012 , you have left us forever. Physically yes, but never mentally. I prayed for god to take you, to release you from all the pain and partly I m glad that it is quite fast. From the time u really felt the pain n till the end, it's almost about 2 weeks. I m glad that I can be with you when u breathe ur last n I hoped that my presence did comfort you n u r not alone when you passed on.

Ma, u r always a strong n independent woman. Even after you found out that you are sick, you did not resent god. You nv asked why you are the one n not others . You accept the fact n continue to live life as per normal , thinking that the demon isn't there. You continue to cook all the delicious food for us, continue to go shopping, visit friends n make the most out of your life while you can. You are my role model n I hoped that I can be as strong as you are.

Do remember to look down from where you are once in a while n pray for us.

Love you,
Your grand-daughter, Wai Ee


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